Musings of an Idle mind

I used to attend weekend bhartanatyam classes with my sister, who is very talented.
i was very happy to bunk those classes too. So i went on with a lot of breaks. but i was always associated with theatre and acting. i  thought that is what it is all about in my life. i am a person for stage and theatre it is for me.
when i got married, it took a while for me to get transferred to the branch in bangalore. so active iam, i was bored sitting all day at home and was panicking that i am bloating each day. then just a thought crossed my mind, why not start bharatanatyam? it was not so surprising then, but a wonderful guru used to stay right up my place.
after a few classes, i overheard whispering to one of her senior students that i look good while dancing. as old habits die hard, i still used to make excuses not to go to the class. meanwhile my transfer happend and i started working. so classes pushed to weekend This lady, my guru, used to wake me up every saturday and sunday at 7.30 am and took me to the class  with her, so i dont bunk making excuses. she waited outside all the while i brushed my teeth, occasionally shouting that i can have my bath after iam back from the class.
then i had my daughter. one night i just wokeup, from my sleep. it was like a spiritual awakening. i cried and aplogised to my guru for being so blind, for being so ignorant, for being so foolish. and i kept on doing it the whole night. may be even now, as i write this. that moment i realised. there was no job, only dance. why bharatanatyam, i dont know, may be gods will.
i never knew its importance and value then. now when i look back, i know what i miss. by the grace of the god, its not too late. now when i look back , i know everything was/is predestined. today i dance for 2hrs a day, but my heart yearns for my guru’s presence.
who ever praises my dance, i still look forward for her comments. my guru. something makes me think, feel she knew it. she knew it right from the beginning, the moment she saw me. she knew my destiny and she showed me the path. only later i realise.